The Death Race, an extremely unappealing event (unless you find crawling under razor wire, digging up tree stumps, and running while carrying a bike frame appealing), is held in Pittsfield, Vermont in June. It's not an event I'm interested in; they don't even tell you what the events are until you arrive at the start. How would you even know how to train?
Two Death Racers, Neil and Andy, have answers to these training questions. And they involve wood-splitting, one of the events from last year's Death Race. When Neil and Andy heard I had a woodpile to split, they arrived pronto (see picture above, courtesy of Ruth Penfield). They tested various axes, mauls, wedges, and splitting tools, timed each other, and generally chopped and chopped and chopped and chopped. (Please don't anyone remind them they they don't even know if wood-splitting will even be one of the events this year...). On the other hand, it might not matter; at one point, Andy looked at their progress.
"It's incredibly satisfying," he said.
He thinks it's satisfying? He should try standing there watching two Death Racers chop their way through your woodpile. Now that's satisfaction.
The only problem with the experience was that, once I had splitters, I wound up doing all the stacking. As my dad will attest (and he would know; I stacked wood for him for like 12 years!), I have never liked stacking. I much prefer to split. Still, the Death Racers saved my back and lots of time. And if there's anyone else looking for "training" opportunities, please give me a call. I have the tools you need to train for your next Death Race.
(Photo below: getting there...)
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